Just for fun….Random conversations with my Trainer Jerymaine Beasley
Texts to setup our first orientation time:
Him: can you meet Saturday at 4:30?
Me: Sure. Wait, Sat…Oh that’s Oregon football day. 4:30’s after the game, there’s a large possibility I will be slightly, too moderately drunk. Are we gonna workout or just talk about working out? Cuz if we are actually gonna workout, I’m guessing I’m no good to you drunk..?
Him: Work out for about 7 minutes.
Me: 7 minutes are you serious? Damn idk about that. OK I’ll get my shit together. I’ll rally. I can do this.
Him: See you Friday at noon.
My trainer hates me. Not the person I want hating me.
Our first meeting: Dreaded orientation.
Him: So how long have you been unhappy about your body?
Me: Since I started watching Dr. 90210
Him: Ohhkay. Well what parts of your body would you like to “fix”.
Me: Any part that plastic surgery would address. Also any part that’s visible.
Him: Sure. OK.
Him: Anything specific you’d like to focus on?
Me: Arms, legs, abs (or lack thereof) bootie and boobies, probably to start with…
Him: I’ll just write down “chest”.
He pulls out a goals chart with 4 goals.
Him: These are the 4 goals or reasons people come to a trainer. Based on our conversations it seems like #1 is what you would like, but I’ll let you pick.
- Lose weight, get lean muscle
- Something, something
- Build muscle, strength training.
- Performance training, elite athlete acceleration.
Him: So which would you like to focus on?
Me: I think it’s pretty clear I’m here for #4.
Him: Look of shock and horror, not sure if he should laugh out loud or hide it for fear of crushing my lack of reality.
Him: Well we can work on that. Maybe we could start with #1. And work up to that?
Me: I’m kidding, you can laugh now.
Him: visible relief and a laugh (I made him laugh!)
Welcome to Sarah’s world. I’m sorry, you have no idea what you got yourself into! We’re gonna have FUN.If you in the Portland Oregon area Coach J holds a FREE boot-camp every Sat… sign up on his Facebook page and get your fitness back!
Sarah Centrella is the author of the book Hustle Believe Receive which teaches you how to apply the #HBRMethod to change your life and live your dream.
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How did you like your trainer overall?